The Broken Vase

My sister in law, Liz, and I were having a conversation not too long ago. Actually we have this conversation quite often…getting rid of junk. Literal junk in our homes. We do not want to become “hoarders” or pack rats.

Matthew 6:19-21 Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

It’s funny what items have emotional ties though. An old stained t-shirt, a book with the cover torn off, a birthday card signed by someone who is now gone, a onesie your baby wore. Continue reading “The Broken Vase”

YOU are a Good Mom

Do you use over the counter medicines or all natural/ essential oils/ earthy products when your kids are sick?

It doesn’t matter. YOU are a good mom.

Does your kid go to daycare or stay home with you?

It doesn’t matter. YOU are a good mom.

Do you feed your kid fast food or cook from scratch?

It doesn’t matter. YOU are a good mom.

Does your kid go to public school, Christian school, or homeschool?

It doesn’t matter. YOU are a good mom.

Did you have a natural birth, c-section, pain management birth adoption…foster…etc?

It doesn’t matter. YOU are a good mom.

Breast or formula?

It doesn’t matter. YOU are a good mom.

The list could go on and on. I find myself reminding myself that I am a good mom even if I choose Tylenol over essential oils. If I opt to stay at home rather than go to work. If I set my kids in front of the tv all day because I just can’t deal. It’s not every day. It’s not every time. Organic vs store brand isn’t always the right answer.

Are your kids happy? Are you happy? Is your family being cared for in the best way that you can provide? YOU are a good mom.

Proverbs 31:28 Her children rise up and call her blessed;

Motherhood isn’t always sunshine and rainbows. That. Is. Okay. It is okay to have a bad moment or a bad day. Maybe even a bad week. I suggest not unpacking and living in that bad moment. Sometimes it’s okay to let it all out. To scream or cry. As mothers we tend to hold ourselves together for the sake of our family. I’m telling you from experience that it is not good to keep emotions all bottled up. You will eventually explode.

Find a good outlet. Try your best to get some alone time or time with a friend. Join a bible study or play group. Don’t let the title of mom define you. But still…YOU are a good mom.

I see you mama. You are tired. Overwhelmed. Done. The judgement sometimes comes flying at you. Unwanted opinions and articles are sent your way. I see you. I hear you. YOU are a good mom.

I am a good mom.

Cultivating Connection

This week I have been hit with small moments of depression. Any amount of depression, no matter how small, is not enjoyable. It hits me at weird times like when I’m driving to the store or a memory pops into my head. I can feel myself shutting down. I want so badly to let the darkness take over and just lay in a bed wallowing. That is exactly what Satan wants. He wants me to grab onto those dark feelings and fall into the pit of hopelessness.

Only by the grace of God am I able to pull myself out of that pit and shake off the darkness and function for my family.

Psalm 23:4 Even though I walk
    through the darkest valley,
I will fear no evil,
    for you are with me;

I am reminded pretty regularly how different we all are. How our mountains look extremely different from someone else’s and our valleys, or pits, can look different as well. But that doesn’t make my suffering or your suffering any less than that of someone else.

Continue reading “Cultivating Connection”

Introverted Mom

Oh man, I am so an introvert. I absolutely cannot be in front of people. I do not like to be the center of attention. Please don’t make me talk to a group, lead a group, read out loud in front of a group. I was the kid that would sweat bullets when the teacher said “lets read out loud” or “I’m going to randomly call on people to answer the questions”. Lord help me my introverted-ness and my anxiety was absolutely paralyzing in school. I only realize that now…it was not obvious back then.

Most of the time, I need time to recuperate after an event. Being social drains my energy. I attended a bridal shower a few weeks ago and I literally needed 3 days before I felt normal. My energy was drained from forcing myself to be social. Every Monday after church is my recovery day from being around people. Life can be exhausting in the most unusual ways.

It may not seem that I am an introvert on paper. It’s easier to share my thoughts when no one is looking back at me. Blogging is serious therapy for me because I can get my words out without being in public. People can read it or not…thats not the point…I’ve said it before but I like to share what I am going through so that others who might be going through something similar will not feel alone.

It is so difficult to be an introvert and to be a parent. I want what is best for my child! I want him to be social and to thrive in situations where there are lots of people. I want him to be outgoing and to be able to make friends. How can I teach him that when I don’t even like leaving my seat during the “shake hands” time during church?

For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline. 2 Timothy 1:7

I would love to be involved in mom groups or play groups but, to be honest, that kind of stuff is SUPER out of my comfort zone. I do not like new social situations- especially when there is no one that I know. We recently took a swimming class and that was out of my comfort zone but I felt that it was important to learn water safety since my little man loves the water. The first day of class I nearly had a panic attack because I didn’t know what to expect. We made it though. And it was great. We didn’t make any lifelong friends but I was able to be a normal human being for the sake of my child.

One thing that I have noticed is that my little man is okay with social situations. He willingly approaches other kids. He shares his toys with them. He initiates a game of tag. These things make me so proud as a parent. I cannot believe that a child of two introverts is able to build a social life better than we can.

Little man and I were in the airport last week and he was restless. There is not a lot to do for an almost 2 year old in a small airport. He was drawn to other families with kids. He went to them, he shared his tractor and a little girl, who was several years older than he, willingly played with him while we waited to board our plane. I did not have to do a thing except supervise. Praise God!

I am doing my best to step out of my comfort zone as a parent to allow for more social situations for my kid. We go to the park and to the library and that’s fine for us right now. Hopefully I will be able to overcome more barriers as he gets older and more social settings will be happening.

I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. Philippians 4:11

As much as I do not like social situations I also have a need to be around other adults from time to time. That is why I am okay with having a few close friends. I can share with them because I trust them and they know me. Over the years I have learned that a few close friends is better than a thousand acquaintances. One thing is for sure and that is that God has been faithful to provide for me the right people in certain points in my life. My close friends have not always been the same people. They change based on the season of life that I am in and I believe that God does that on purpose. He always provides what we need at the moment we need it-even for me as an introvert.