At Least

Two words I am trying to say less are “at least”. More specifically I am trying not to downplay someone’s suffering.

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When a friend tells you “I lost my pregnancy” is it your first instinct to reply with “at least it was early on” or “at least you already have a child”?

When a loved one shares with you the difficulty they are facing taking care of their parent is your first instinct to say “at least you still have that parent” or “at least you aren’t juggling small kids while taking care of your parent”?

When anyone shares a difficulty that they are facing my natural instinct is to downplay it or explain to them they what they are going through could be far worse. My first instinct is to compare their suffering to what I’ve suffered through. But the fact of the matter is that we all go through different suffering. Not one person can experience the exact same thing that another person is experiencing-not even siblings or a spouse. We all suffer differently and we all grieve differently. We all celebrate differently and experience different types of joy. Why? Because we are all created differently.

Ephesians 2:10 For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.

I have definitely made more of an effort to think before I speak when someone is sharing something personal. I try extremely hard to not just reply with “at least…”. The best thing that I can do is listen, absorb, love and pray.

Romans 14:13 Therefore let us stop passing judgment on one another. Instead, make up your mind not to put any stumbling block or obstacle in the way of a brother or sister.

The best advice that I can give is to be honest but in a loving way. If you don’t understand then say something along the lines of “that sounds terrible, I cannot begin to understand what you are going through but I will be praying for you (maybe even pray in the moment if you are led to do so).

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There are so many things that I have never experienced but what I have experienced I am willing to share. I have had close friends refer me to their friends or family who are facing difficulties similar to mine; they weren’t able to help but they knew that I might have knowledge that could help or encourage.

1 thought on “At Least”

  1. Good words! Thanks for sharing and being so open – I know this is helping people – including myself at times. Someone said the other day to me something along the lines of; “ there are only about two preachable scriptures in the entire Bible that can be preached and receive an alter response ( when preached on the content and information given). BUT there is a bible full of scripture that can be preached even with no content when the scripture has been experienced and lived out and learned by the person with real emotion and rawness and depth and when shared in a vulnerable state – when that scripture is made personal – it goes from just being head knowledge to heart knowledge – and God can use the brokenness we’ve experienced, the rawness, the most vulnerable places in our story to move others hearts in such a radical way which can/will even produce a full alter out of the simplest of things.” Simply put it is the difference between head knowledge and heart knowledge. God is using you in these blogs to help others – so thank you and keep being honest, keep being raw, keep being vulnerable- keep opening your story up for judgement and mom shaming, and allow your pride and fear of what others might think to be shattered – when we are His – Our story belongs to Him and it is no longer ours to keep but to share – and you are doing that! So I give you “snaps” and encourage you that even on the hardest weeks – God is something to say through you! Life is an adventure- it’s how you choose to see it and how you choose to share it that makes all the difference! Thanks sister!

    Liked by 1 person

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