They say it takes a village to raise a child. What happens when you don’t have a village or at least don’t feel like you have a village. Sometimes it’s easy for me to think that I have no support when it comes to my child. I know that people love me and him but when I need some rare “me time” it’s hard to find someone who will take over. It’s not that they don’t want to help it’s that in society today we are so busy with a job or perhaps multiple jobs. We have prior commitments. We have children of our own. We have our own schedules to keep. We are a selfish people.
I have been really struggling lately with depression. My focus is to keep my child happy and healthy. I put myself on the back burner and don’t take care of myself. My little man is my everything but I feel so unwanted by everyone else around me. Why can’t I be the priority in someone’s life? Why won’t someone call me just to ask how I’m doing? Why won’t people text me or even reply to my text? Honestly it hurts. I think part of it is me being selfish.
For he satisfies the longing soul, and the hungry soul he fills with good things. Psalm 107:9
I want to be thought of, I want validation from others. I realize now that maybe this is a lesson. Maybe God is isolating me so that I reach out towards Him. He is the only one I need validation from. He cares for me. That is all that matters. When that is your main focus then everything else falls into place.
But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.
2 Corinthians 12:9
What happens when you fall away from God is that your happiness drains. Nothing seems to go right. Relationships struggle. Worry consumes you. Little things that shouldn’t matter do matter and they matter too much. You start comparing yourself to your friends on social media and get jealous. At least that’s what happens to me. What causes all that? Sin. Simple as that. Sin.
Satan knows the buttons to push in our life to make us crumble. Once you let him get a hold on you he will continue to bring you down. He wants you to fall away so that Jesus isn’t your reason anymore.
“In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold.
So, what to do? Give it ALL to God and go to bed. Seriously, have a conversation with Him. Lay it all out. He will take it from you and you never have to think of it again. That is what is so wonderful about Gods redeeming grace. He loves us so much that he sent His son to die so that we could be redeemed.
Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Matthew 11:28
I think it’s time to take a step back from social media for a while. Though you may not get daily reminders of my existence know that I am still here and I am working on myself and my relationship with Jesus.
I will probably update my blog occasionally and if you don’t want to miss a post then just subscribe to it. You’ll get an email notifying you of when I have a new post. Simple.